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Chapter 1: Mistakes
Ryeowook doesn’t comment on Kyuhyun’s silence. Doesn’t say anything about Kyuhyun’s sudden change in behavior.
It’s three in the morning, they’re walking back to the dorms, and Ryeowook is shivering. Ryeowook clasps a can of coffee he got from a vending machine earlier, he finds the warmth lacking, had they been walking that long? Ryeowook didn’t notice.
Ryeowook’s breath comes out in small puffs as he doubles his pace, trying to catch up with Kyuhyun who doesn’t seem to notice the other boy almost stumbling over trying to match his pace. The streets are empty and they have reached a tall lamppost when Kyuhyun suddenly stops walking, as if fascinated at the thing in front of him. The lamppost had a busted light.
“What’s wrong? Why’d you stop?” Ryeowook asks out of breath. Ahead of him, Kyuhyun’s bomber jacket is a striking red in the darkness.
“I kissed Yesung.”
Ryeowook skids to a halt, “What?”
“I mean… we kissed… at the after concert party last week. We were drunk and…”
Kyuhyun falters and turns around to look at Ryeowook. There is a flash of red and the next thing Ryeowook sees is Kyuhyun picking up a can of coffee, Ryeowook stares down at his empty hand and frowns, he didn’t even notice he’d dropped it.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought you out here.” Kyuhyun’s warm hands gently envelop Ryeowook’s, “You’re shaking.” Kyuhyun looks at Ryeowook a bit remorsefully. “And don’t look at me like that. Yesung said it was a mistake and I…” he hesitates a little.
“I think so too.”
They stand there for a long time, just listening to each other’s breathing, and contemplating what this could mean, how it could affect them. All thoughts of this are left unspoken though, and nothing more is discussed between them even after they decide to walk back home.
The road back home is cold and laden with heavy silence and Ryeowook doesn’t comment about the look in Kyuhyun’s face that tells him it was anything but a mistake.
Ryeowook sits cross leg in his bed, leaning against the wall, staring at the bed opposite his… Yesung’s bed. Yesung walks in after awhile, greets him cheerfully, and then peers at his turtle tank.
Ryeowook doesn’t respond to Yesung’s greeting and merely redirects his gaze to the spot between Yesung’s neck and shoulders. And there it was, Ryeowook notices for the first time, the tell tale marks barely covered by Yesung’s white shirt.
Something twists in Ryeowook’s gut and he suddenly feels sick in the stomach. Ryeowook’s fingers dig in the sheets, fighting the overwhelming feeling of wanting to hurt Yesung. It felt wrong, Ryeowook knew he shouldn’t be angry but like poison in his system, he couldn’t stop it from spreading.
As if sensing this, Yesung eyes him warily, “You’re quiet today, did something happen?”
Ryeowook turns his head away, “Nothing hyung.” He answers softly.
“Got into a fight with Kyuhyun again?”
Ryeowook whips his head back sharply to Yesung’s direction, anger bursting into him like wildfire, “It’s got nothing to do with Kyuhyun.” He tells him, voice cold.
Yesung looks taken aback at the force of Ryeowook’s gaze and Ryeowook suddenly felt guilty, “Sorry, I was just asking.” Yesung says, eyeing him warily and looking like he wanted to ask him what’s wrong but Yesung lets an uncomfortable silence settle between them instead.
“Ryeowook?” Yesung tries again after a moment. The silence is probably getting to him, he’s not used to this cold treatment, especially from Ryeowook.
The younger man only looks at him expectantly.
“Has Kyuhyun been acting different lately? Like there’s something bothering him?”
Ryeowook’s fingers in the sheets dig deeper. “What do you mean hyung?” he asks, almost innocently, “Kyuhyun has been acting like normal, is there anything he should be bothered with?” Ryeowook answers, his voice neutral, casual. Ryeowook even manages a smile.
A disappointed look crosses Yesung’s face. “It’s nothing.” He says and ends their conversation then.
Ryeowook knows he’s going to hate himself in the morning for this, but as fast as the thought crosses his mind, he immediately banishes them away.
There is a small revelation there. But this is also the day when Ryeowook started lying to himself.
Unbetaed once again. ^0^